Originally posted by Mr.Hanky
Ask them if they mind working third shift? That'll weed out about 70% right there.
Tell them they have to be on pager support indefinatly.

I'll think of more later.

MH
... and no remote access, even for 3am callouts.

But then if they don't mind working third shift, that just tells you they're either ...

i) a loser with no friends or life outside work, or ...
ii) desperate for any work at all

... so if they agree then you just kick their ass out anyway.